it always takes 2 hands to clap, but it nvr seems to be ...

im trying to avoid staying at home
whenever i can, i will and want to get out
when im home, im soo stress and tired of everything
i don hate anyone in the family, blame it all on me
the problem lies with me , i don't know too
i made a vow nvr to make her cry anymore / disppoint her
yet i didnt keep th vow, i didnt make her cry but disappoint her
she must be thinking why this child of hers make her so heartbroken
she must be thinking why god is so unfair to her
i seem to be the one who cant communicate with her
but today when i tried, what she gave me was, shit
i was totally turned off and upset,
i told myself i will study hard and make her proud
i told myself i don't want to make her worried anymore
i really want to, but its very hard
blame me for everything,
i miss calling her everyday, miss her cooking and everything
but i didnt tell her, i haven been talking to her
when i try and try and things don work anymore ,
i feel very sad inside, im tired

sorry for being so emo in th earlier part of the post
i need to release my tears that i've been holding on
im now better after a cry alone,

today was just gym, town and back home
really tire out by th 10mins spreen today
no photos for the day , thanks to my phone for being dead
anyw haji lane was cool and found a cool cafe to chill
shall upload more photos tmr since there's gym again (:
sooo await for photos tmr (:

i will as what everyone tells me, stay strong & be happy (: